What if.....

So, Bryan said it's my turn to write something, so...here I am. What to write? Well...what's been on my mind lately is...what if...what if at this time of my life, I'm still living here in Thailand all this time? What if I had never moved to America? What would my life look like? What would I be doing right now for a living? Would I be married? And to whom? Children? But most importantly, would I have God in my life?

As I observe life here, and remembering how life was for me in my younger days, I think my life would have been no life at all. Life is very hard for the poor especially the kids and the elderly here, and poor is what it was for my family when I was young. I could say more like poverty level as we lived in a slum area of Bangkok. One of these days I really have to write all this down in detail somewhere. Anyway, I was going to school, my mom saw to that, thanks mom. But I don't know how far, because state school only goes to 8th grade, after that it costs to go, and no money for that. So...today if I still lived in Bangkok, I would most likely be...a street vendor worker, a lottery ticket seller, a street sweeper or worse I might have been in prostitution in my younger days and now still doing something in that area, who knows? I don't know as far as marriage or children, but I probably would go to temple daily, giving lots of offerings hoping for a better life in the next.


As I see it, God had His hand on my life even before I got to the USA...well, even before I was born. I thank God for His guiding on my life, keeping me whole with all that happened to me as a child, the sacrifice my mom made so that I could come to America, even though I didn't really want to. Giving me a stepfather that cared for me even though we couldn't communicate very well. Leading me to university near Spokane so that I could meet Bryan, my husband. Giving us Christa, Matt, and Andi, and later all the grand babies. Sometimes it overwhelms me to think, what if... then I praise God for all He has done. And I pray for Thailand...

It has been mixed feelings, as most of you who follow and support us know (by the way, thank you so much for that). The feeling of missing our family and friends, of not quite knowing what we are doing here when things are not going the way we think they should go, and also the adjustments we have to make as we go. Sometimes I see Bryan trying so hard to do "Thai" and not quite getting it, I feel bad for him. Or the slow motion of things that should not take that long to do or start...we think, why?

Then, there are times that I know I am where God wants me to be. In obedience, I am first of all here to support my husband in his calling, to connect back with my roots before I'm too old, and I am here to represent Him (God) as I live among the people He puts in front of me daily (living "life"), this include my girls I work with at New Life Center as well.

So, those are some of my thoughts these days. Now we try to take it a day at a time, thinking only how we can be the best to the person in front of us right now..... Please pray, we do need it daily.

Thank you for your time........... God Bless, Kalya